organic a natural home ABSURD "In a store, when you have pornography on a shelf, a decent store owner would cover it up. Here, we actually set it in place and ask people to stare at it."
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naturism STORY
nudermaphobiaMay 30, 2001 I use an e-news clipping service and over the last few months I've found several stories that point out American's nuttiness about nakedness. The stories vary pretty widely so I'll just kind of summarize them and give you a link. The first three are good examples of how Americans freak out about nude bodies in general and how they then take it upon themselves to impose their own moralities on those who see things with a more open mind. None of these stories has to do with anything overtly sexual or even covertly sexual. They are just about the public display of nude bodies, in this case all males, which seems to be a particularly prickly (pun intended) subject for the nude police. And in this case these aren't even real bodies. One is a sculpture, one is a painting and one is actually a snowman! Lake Alfred, FLORIDA – A replica of Michelangelo's David displayed outside a central Florida shop, prompted a series of complaints to City Hall. The store owner voluntarily covered the statue with a loin cloth to avoid problems. "I didn't even know it was art," said Jeanne Johnson, the owner of a nearby barber shop who was among those who complained. I wonder what the heck she thought it was? What I find disturbing about the whole thing is that Ms. Johnson can't even recognize one of the most well known sculptures in the world. NEW YORK – An artist has painted a loincloth over a nude figure of the crucified Jesus in a mural at a new building at Kennedy International Airport after complaints from construction workers. The image of Jesus, about 18 inches high, is part of one of several 8-by-10-foot reliefs depicting city street scenes. In the image of our creator... or something like that. LaCrosse, WISCONSIN – In LaCrosse, two brothers, Clint and Donald Olsen created an anatomically correct snowman which they named "Monty," after the movie "The Full Monty." But after getting complaints from other residents, police ordered the brothers to alter the snowman's anatomy. They complied by knocking the appendage off with a shovel. They could have been fined $90.50 for disorderly conduct. "It wasn't meant to offend anybody," Donald Olson, 18, said. "In a way, it's art." We don't tolerate art in America boys at least not if it depicts a naked body. I mean heck, half the time we don't even recognize that it is art. This next story illustrates just how ridiculous the nude police can be. No. Kansas City, MISSOURI – A new community center in No. Kansas City has a sign declaring "no bare midriffs". A patron named Kerri Jacks, was asked to leave even though she was wearing a long-sleeve sweat suit. Apparently, when she lifted weights above her head, her sweat suit top rose a few inches above her waist, exposing her abdomen. Greg Hansen, the community center's director, said the gym's dress code was written to foster a "non-intimidating and welcoming atmosphere." ...for anti-nude fanatics apparently. Welcome to your new community center Kerri. Now get the hell out. How does a few inches of a woman's stomach become intimidating? How? Because the nude police make it so. They draw attention to it and then declare it wrong or obscene. A situation just like that occurred in Sacramento, California just last summer. Members of the Advanced Training Institute International — a conservative home-schooling organization meeting at the Sacramento Convention Center — took offense at a nude statue of Poseidon which was a gift to Sacramento from the Greek government in 1972 and sought permission to clothe him.
The Convention and Visitors Bureau acquiesced, and Poseidon appeared on various days in a toga, khaki pants and finally when pictures of him were snapped for the front page of the local paper, in a shirt, tie and slacks. Absurd. Are we not men? How did we come to be so ashamed of our own bodies? I just don't understand. When the lunch room philosophers at work were discussing the Poseidon Adventure, I asked them, "If this building were on fire and the only way you could save yourself was to take off your clothes, make a rope out of them and lower yourself down to the parking lot, would you do it?" Almost universally they said, "No." Most said they would try to think of something else but would not disrobe where they would be seen. I was stunned. They would actually risk death by fire rather than have some co-workers see them naked. I said, "Well if that situation ever occurs, while you're sitting in this burning building trying to think of something to do, you're going to see my naked butt running across that parking lot to safety. – dave © Copyright iriguchi 2001 |
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